Box of Treasures or Pandora's Box?

I have received so many emails and private messages from my last post, it is surprising! Mostly people are sharing back some aspect of their journey with me... it sparked memories and feelings from their lives and histories. It's wonderful. And it prompts me to carry on here.

I've had a little bit of time to reflect back on the last 20 years of my travels and my life. There is a box sitting on my bookshelf and it is filled with little treasures that I've collected over those years on my travels. It has occurred to me that I would like to find a special box to host these items. My first thought, seeing as I live on the west coast and call this home now,  was that it might be nice to have a bentwood box, crafted by a local artisan from a west coast First Nation. I've always loved and admired the concept and the craftsmanship and meaning, and I have photographed and drooled over more than I can count over the years. 

So I started looking online. The first stop naturally was to look to Lattimer Gallery but then I came across some other  interesting boxes on eBay. It seems that bentwood boxes are also a traditional art form made by craftspeople in Norway. I also happened to be looking through old family photos that afternoon, and one of my maternal grandmother was sitting out on the coffee table. Grandma was adopted, and we know very little about her background, other than her parents were far too young, and they were from Norway.  

What actually happened in Jordan is quite manageable. It's manageable because I have incredible friends there who helped me, the body heals, and I'll be fine. Jordan was one of the most remarkable trips I've had. I recommend it highly. 

What's really important for me to reflect on is what happened metaphorically, metaphysically, on that journey. A switch flipped. That physical experience I had opened an important pathway. While on holiday there I started to take a parallel journey inward... and now that I'm home, I can really start this new sojourn.

Something Happened in Jordan

This blog went to the wayside when I left the Maldives, partly because I stopped ‘being somewhere else from where I’m from’ and I returned to Canada, so the story stopped. I could have resurrected this blog, this story, to share aspects of my recent journey to Jordan. But I did not. I shared that through crumbs on instagram instead. And really, who cares. They are just travel photos. I took the same photos that everyone else does who goes there....

Something happened to me in Jordan. Something I was not expecting. It was life changing and somewhat profound and crushing yet strangely relieving, at least it was for me.  This came on the back of losing my dad this year and all the turmoil that goes with that. And of losing my love just before that (painfully) while I was trying to readjust to life in Canada. Of losing my past-mother-in-law just after dad passed, reminding me of yet another entire life lost and the sorrow that goes with that…

And then, of gaining! Gaining a permanent job to be proud of. Rare in my circles. Of being near my mom again after so many years and years away- having Christmas dinner together now instead of my baking yet another a sad chicken breast in the toaster oven over too much wine- alone somewhere with the Grinch on in the background.  I now feel a sense of home in my cute downtown Victoria apartment, junkies yelling under my window in summer, street lights changing from red to green to red to green, illuminating my face through the venetian blinds as I fall to sleep.  I love this town, Victoria. I could stay here. I never say that.

But something happened when I was in the promised land a couple weeks ago… the universe slapped my face back into place. I was reminded of our fragility as humans. Or at least my lot in life…. ‘Don’t get too comfortable’, the universe said. ‘You’re not meant for easy.’ So I'm looking to silver linings, and I am exploring what good can come of this. Stay tuned.